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Brenda Woodberg: I can't... this isn't me... I can't do this anymore. I go out for you and I do these things with strangers, and then I get home and I gotta wash this stuff out of my hair before my parents... I can't do it anymore!
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Mark Wessler: Brenda, when you go home I want you to take a picture of yourself, because right now, you're perfection. And I want you to look at that picture every day and never change.
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[first lines]
Shirley Lyner: Shirley Lyner. I'm a junior at Alfred E. Groves high school. This is my babysitting service. The answer is no: mom doesn't drink, dad didn't hit me, Uncle Steve never showed me his privates. I don't even have an Uncle Steve. The money is nice, and paid fellatio isn't that much more humiliating than flipping burgers. But that's not why I do it.
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Shirley Lyner: [on phone] Are we going to hell?
Michael Beltran: Yup.
Shirley Lyner: [delighted to be right] I knew it!
Michael Beltran: I gotta go.
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George's Wife Fran: Shirley has a whole bunch of girls working for her. She's very enterprising.
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Jerry Tuchman: We're the best thing that's ever going to happen to these girls.
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Gail Beltran: [finding Shirley at the Diner] Shirley, hi! You come here? That's so cute.
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Brenda Woodberg: I can't do this anymore!
Shirley Lyner: Listen to me, Brenda. You want out? You are out. But... be... quiet.
Melissa Brown: [walking up as Brenda exits, crying] What's going on?
Shirley Lyner: Family problems.
Melissa Brown: Yeah, no shit.
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Gail Beltran: Michael, I'm only going to say this once. Were you - ?
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Shirley Lyner: So... Should I add you to the roster or are you just a one-timer?
Nadine Woodberg: [pause] I'll do it again.
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Brenda Woodberg: [at the door, with her sister Nadine] I'm busy tonight, so is it okay if Nadine sits?
George: [pause] Could I get both of you?
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Jerry Tuchman: [on phone] Hey, Shirley - I would like to order some pussy.
Shirley Lyner: You mind not saying that on the phone?
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Melissa Brown: You know what the pimps say: I didn't make her a ho. She was a ho already.
Shirley Lyner: That's great. You heard that where?
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Melissa Brown: It's a little silly to regret something that never happened, according to you.
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Nadine Woodberg: [hearing a crash from Shirley's end of the phone] What was that?
Shirley Lyner: My life.
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Shirley Lyner: We all lead secret lives, even if only in our heads. I guess the question is: Why? Aren't there easier ways to pinch myself awake?
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[last lines]
Shirley Lyner: Guess it was just one of those moments, a unique detail in an otherwise ordinary life.
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Melissa Brown: [talking about babysitting in class] Make any money?
Shirley Lyner: Yeah.
Melissa Brown: How much?
Shirley Lyner: Two hundred dollars.
Melissa Brown: Jesus, Shirl. What'd you do, suck Mr. Beltran's cock?
The Babysitters Quotes
Extended Reading