Xue Wei: When we talk about love, we are actually talking about "who am I"

Eryn 2022-04-23 07:01:44

What is the essence of love? What the hell is love? When we talk about love, we're talking about who I am - who I am, because love is an integral part of who I am.

"In the Mood for Love" expounds love from the perspective of extramarital affairs, and tells the story of two families being betrayed by their partners in the context of an era when extramarital affairs became the norm and people suppressed themselves. So, what does such a story have for the development and balance of personal psychology? meaning?

When Zhou Muyun and Su Lizhen found out that each other's partner had betrayed them, they did not go to the outside to seek evidence for confirmation, but silently endured it. As their inner feelings became clearer, they truly confirmed the occurrence of the betrayal. This passive approach is very oriental, lacking self-awareness, unable to control one's own destiny, and unable to lead one's own life. It is destined to be passive in the end. However, it seems to have achieved another balance.

In many scenes in the movie, they confirm their judgments through subjective evidence. After they have confirmed it, there have been many simulations and imaginations: subjectively judge how a partner started with each other, how they got together, etc., None of these inner movements are objective, but more subjective - how I actually feel.

In the process, the male and female protagonists gradually develop feelings for each other. However, their connection is not through the body, but through the emotion. This emotion is vague, oppressive and painful. However, this kind of love seems to be absent, but it actually exists.

If Zhou Muyun and Su Lizhen are directly put into the marriage relationship, there will be responsibilities, obligations and social rules. Once they gain a sense of certainty, they become rule users, and the bondage makes it difficult to maintain the relationship in the long term. If the relationship between two people is absent, there will be regrets every time, as if there is a layer of yarn separated, as long as the other party enters a little more, this matter may have results. But if the veil breaks, with results, that feeling may be gone.

In this movie, the body feels strong, but Wong Kar Wai doesn't push it up the body, nor the rules, so that their relationship becomes a living event, as if It lingers forever, always on the fringes of the rules. Of course, Wong Kar Wai did not push the male and female protagonists into sex, so that their original identities would not be destroyed, so they just betrayed their spirits, and still obeyed social rules in their actions.

There is no freedom in "In the Mood for Love", because the hero and heroine are very concerned about the eyes of others. They say that others can think what they want, and they have a clear conscience. The so-called clear conscience means that although I don't want to, but I can't help but have feelings, so I am condemned by the society. The code of conduct comes from the shame brought by the eyes of others, so that it has formed a rule that is recognized by society and has a great impact. This is a typical oriental situation: the boundaries between people are unclear, and they look warm, There are also many emotional connections, but at the same time, behavior is limited and influenced by others.

The love in this movie is destined to be fruitless, with ambiguity and uncertainty, giving people infinite reverie, and allowing moviegoers to put their own projections on it. The love between Zhou Muyun and Su Lizhen has been missed countless times. Zhou Muyun seems to be a little cowardly, but if he becomes brave and puts his feelings into sex, this relationship will end.

The West says that love is a matter of one person; "In the Mood for Love" says that love exists between two people. This relationship ends with their respective identities, and is only placed in their hearts, without materializing or sexualizing it. In this way, no matter how time passes, love will still not disappear.

Later, Zhou Muyun went to Cambodia, told the secret in his heart to the tree hole, and sealed it in the tree hole. Since then, this relationship has become a secret between each other. Even if that person leaves, that feeling will always exist. This is the eternal feeling.

The feeling of love inevitably has certain pain and regret, and it can only be forgotten in the rivers and lakes forever.

This article is excerpted from Xue Wei 's "Ten Lectures on Psychological Metaphors in Movies: Sex, Loneliness, Conflict and Redemption from the Perspective of Eastern and Western Cultures"

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Extended Reading
  • Stewart 2021-11-15 08:01:27

    The best story is not the seven or forty-nine rounds of the war, but it is hesitating and stopping.

  • Alexandrine 2021-11-15 08:01:27

    Everything is gone, Hong Kong, 1962, that old secret... "If you have an extra ticket, will you go with me?" Maybe~ maybe~

In the Mood for Love quotes

  • Chow Mo-wan: It's me. If there's an extra ticket... would you go with me?

    Su Li-zhen Chan: It's me. If there's an extra ticket... would you go with me?

  • Su Li-zhen Chan: Am I hopeless?

    Chow Mo-wan: Not really.