Agent J:
[walks up to K, who is now the postmaster of Turro, Massachusetts at a post office; K's name tag reads "Kevin Brown"]
'' Kevin. Heh. Wow. Kevin. That's funny. You just don't have a "Kevin"... You don't remember me, but we used to work together.
Kevin Brown/K:
I never worked in a funeral home. Something I can do for you, Slick?
Agent J:
Okay. Straight to the point.
[whispers in a serious voice]
Agent J:
You are a former agent of a top-secret organization that monitors extraterrestrials on Earth. We're the Men in Black. We have a situation, and we need your help.
Kevin Brown/K:
There's a free mental health clinic at the corner of Lilac and East Valley. Next!
Young Girl at Post Office:
Excuse me.
Agent J:
Hey.
Young Girl at Post Office:
20 Rugrats stamps, please.
Kevin Brown/K:
Elizabeth. The United States Postal Service hasn't quite kept up with today's youth, but I can offer you some Berlin airlift stamps.
Young Girl at Post Office:
No.
Kevin Brown/K:
Opera legends?
Young Girl at Post Office:
No.
Kevin Brown/K:
American Samoa?
Young Girl at Post Office:
No.
Kevin Brown/K:
Amish quilts?
Young Girl at Post Office:
No.
Agent J:
[moves Elizabeth over]
I'm sorry, sweetie. Got a world to save here.
[turns back to K]
Agent J:
There was no coma. It was all a cover-up.
Kevin Brown/K:
Who are you?
Agent J:
The question is, who are you?
Kevin Brown/K:
I'm the postmaster of Truro, Massachusetts, and I'm ordering you to leave these premises.
