I have very little practical experience in intimacy, and I should have expected it like a teenage girl, but movie after movie has kept me on my toes. Interestingly, I also love to watch sweet love movies, but the sugar they provide often has a very short shelf life, even if you forget it, and the likes of "My King", "Marriage Story", "Revolutionary Road" Such films can leave a deep impression on my heart, perhaps because pain is more real than happiness.
I have listened to a lot of podcasts recently, and I like to use intimacy to describe the connection between two people. Because love and marriage, they are not the same thing. The good thing is that they appear at the same time in this movie, so you can feel the relationship between the two more intuitively. different.
How fast and easy does love happen? Looking at each other in the bar, inviting the other party to talk at home all night long, exchanging calls in the morning, and still keeping the last shred of reason on the bed, the hostess asked, "You can't fall in love with me so quickly?" The host replied " How long will that take? I'll be back in ten minutes." From then on, it got out of hand. They used the hormones on them to exercise crazy power. As for what they did, I don't remember because it is usually beyond the comprehension of bystanders. .
How fast and easy is the collapse of the marriage? After an incident, the male protagonist begged the female protagonist to have a child for him with a very strong and begging attitude. From then on, the relationship between the two changed from love to marriage. There was no transition during this period, and the change was completely and devastating. Pushing the film to a climax step by step.
The whole film is narrated from the perspective of women, so that you cannot understand the psychological change process of the male protagonist, but this is also a place that I find very interesting, that is, the male protagonist has always maintained the image of a master of love and cynicism in the movie. The only thing that seems to change from start to finish is the hairstyle. But the heroine has gone through so much, from being a lawyer with a certain social status, to indulging in love, then post-pregnancy depression, post-partum widow-style parenting, during which her husband was drinking and taking drugs, suspected of cheating, and even after the divorce, the two have been entangled. unclear state.
The scene that broke my heart the most was that the heroine was going through a very torturous pregnancy, while the hero rented a small apartment near the house privately and explained to the heroine, "We just have a good time together, We'll be happy to see each other and laugh again, and it's been a long time since we've done that."
At this point, I once again realized the importance of change in the relationship, specifically the importance of synchronous change. At the time of the encounter, the heroine fell in love with the male protagonist because of his self-confidence and romance, and at the time of separation, it was also because of the male protagonist's self-confidence and romance that overwhelmed her. Their imaginations about family are different. The female protagonist is ready to be a wife and mother, but the male protagonist is not. The female protagonist wanted to move forward, but the male protagonist stayed where he was, and even asked her, "Why do you want me to become what you want?"
The heroine's life is like her injured knee, which can only bend backward but cannot move forward.
"I don't want to love you anymore, and I don't want to suffer anymore", the subtext is that I still love you, but loving you makes me miserable.
The emotional occurrence of this movie may be too western. The target Asian movie reminds me of Japan's "Theatre". Similar to this movie, it is the heroine who is trapped. What is even more frightening is that it is also the heroine who tries to excuse the man. "Actually, you are not at fault, because nothing has changed, you have grown up without authorization, and it is me who is anxious to change, so I hate myself more and more."
In this film, both men and women are people with strong personalities. What I see is not the opposition of genders, but only the complexity of the relationship. Life is not flat and forward. We are like two points in a multi-dimensional relationship. When life rolls forward, if the two points do not move forward together, looking back, they are already scattered on different coordinates in space.
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