Dr. Allison Reed:
Your Honor, if the Court would allow me to depose Dr. Kane?
Ira Kane:
Depose *me*?
Brigadier Gen. Russell Woodman:
Oh, we think your past is very relevant, Doctor Kane. These issues speak directly to his competence as a scientist.
Dr. Allison Reed:
Dr. Kane, you were a top-level researcher at USAMRIID from '94 to '97, were you not?
Ira Kane:
Yes, that's correct.
Dr. Allison Reed:
And you were summarily dismissed in the summer of 1997. Any idea why?
Ira Kane:
My services were no longer required?
Dr. Allison Reed:
Uh-huh. So, in your opinion, your firing had nothing to do with an experimental anthrax vaccine that you developed and administered to nearly 140,000 U.S. soldiers in May of that year?
Ira Kane:
[leans in and whispers, smiling]
I see where you're going with this.
[louder]
Ira Kane:
It may have been a factor, you'd have to ask the Joint Chiefs of Staff.
Dr. Allison Reed:
I'll make a note to do that. But for now, can you tell me what happened to the soldiers who were inoculated with your vaccine?
Ira Kane:
Well, uh, none of them got anthrax, if that's what you're asking.
Dr. Allison Reed:
What did they get?
Ira Kane:
Um, well, as with any new vaccine, there were certain side effects associated with it.
Dr. Allison Reed:
Could you be more specific?
Ira Kane:
Well, it was a wide range of things, it's very technical, I'd hate to waste the court's time getting into it right now.
Dr. Allison Reed:
Humor me.
Ira Kane:
Some debilitating stomach cramps... severe diarrhea... memory loss.
Dr. Allison Reed:
Yes? Go on. Any more symptoms?
[Harry is looking mortified and shocked at the defense table]
Ira Kane:
Partial facial paralysis, temporary blindness, drooling, bleeding gums, erectile dysfunction, uncontrollable flatulence. I think that's it.
Dr. Allison Reed:
One more question. Do you happen to remember what the soldiers called this illness, Doctor Kane?
Ira Kane:
Yeah. They called it "The Kane Madness."