This is a dilemma with no way out

Wayne 2021-12-29 08:01:48

This is a very very personal article, and some people will definitely think that my three views are wrong. But I can't bear it, I'm sorry, bear it.

Tully is the movie. During the process of watching the movie, I felt chills on the back spine. It was psychologically uncomfortable and extremely uncomfortable. After reading it, I really want to cry. I know that this movie can actually be analyzed in depth from many perspectives such as psychological mapping and female growth, but I am completely overwhelmed by emotions. It is the emotion of fear and despair. In my opinion, the root of all problems lies in fertility. On this matter. The car accident is the climax of the plot, and then the mystery is revealed and turned to the end. Do you think everything is getting better? No, there is no way out of this dilemma, and there is no way out. From the moment the child is born, you have thrown all your life in.

The movie begins before the third child of the heroine Marlo. At the very fragile stage of inconvenience, she went to school with her pregnant belly in the endless screaming and kicking of the two older children, listening to the principal while pretending to be caring and saying "I love your kids" while firmly demanding The son dropped out of school. "He is… quirky." The meaningless concealment and comfort in front of these outsiders cannot conceal the collapse she displayed in front of the unreasonable children.

Immediately after the third child was born, it was Marlo who was awakened by crying every night, it was Marlo who was suffering from the pain of milk increase, and it was Marlo who carried the baby to continue to communicate with the principal in hypocrisy. As for the husband, a kiss before going to work, teasing the baby after get off work, is actually soothing tenderness. At night, I would just lie on the bed and play games, and watch the exhausted Marlo face the dining table with a gloomy face, "Frozen piazza?" And the two older children would only scream at Marlo's severely deformed figure between the troubles. "What happened to you, mom?"

Then Tully, who fell from the sky like Mary Poppins, brought a miracle to Marlo, who was on the verge of collapse, like a ray of sunlight. She is young, active and full of energy, cleaning and baking to take care of babies omnipotent. And she also understands Marlo very like a friend. In their conversation, we gradually see that Marlo was once a girl full of dreams, and all the magnificent mermaid dreams no longer belong to her as a wife and a mother. She may be willing to take on these in her heart, and she even refuses to accept outside assistance, but people always have their limits. The limit may bring a turn for the better, but it may also bring destruction, and more likely, nothing will change.

In fact, it's very coincidental. I just talked to my mother about it on the phone the day before. A two-month-old second child from a relative's family was admitted to the hospital, and the whole family couldn't sleep at night. I am not emotional, and I am not a person who is so easily agitated. I just used a very casual tone to frankly express one of my long-term thoughts: Actually, I don't understand why I should have children? Finally, I have some spare money and some free time. What is wrong with me, why should I give it to a child? My mother’s answer is the standard answer. I even laughed out loud when I heard that sentence, it was like a joke on Weibo, but you suddenly realized that it’s not a joke at all but reality, "Then if you think about humans like you How do you reproduce?"

Human reproduction has never been my responsibility! I do not have children, the world will not destroy mankind, nor will it become extinct! ! !

In recent years, news of parturient women jumping off the building and severe postpartum depression are not uncommon. There is a plot in the movie. Marlo was peeing under strict "observation and guidance" by the nurse just after giving birth. She burst into anger instantly. Maternity has no dignity. This is even true in developed countries like the United States. In a country where per capita medical resources are extremely scarce, this situation is even more unimaginable, and this is what was specifically mentioned in many Weibo comments. Arrived. After the baby is born, the nightmare will only intensify. The sovereignty of the breast will no longer belong to you, but just an organ that serves the baby. What is the difference between a milking machine and a cow? Suffer the pain of rising milk and being bitten by baby teeth. And what is not mentioned in the movie, and I don’t know if it is considered Chinese characteristics, is the endless relatives and elders. They will inspect you over and over again like a tourist group visiting a zoo, and then they will point out all the details of your life without hesitation, and you are already exhausted but you still have to smile at them. . And the husband? Really, Drew in the movie is already doing well, the reality will only be more cruel. Since then, I have lost interest in you who are out of shape, and will only accuse you of imperfections such as housework, and disagreements are even more verbal. The hardship of raising a child is yours, and the fun of playing with the child is his, and all this seems to be what it should be.

When Marlo said to Tully, "Free spirit is no more amazing." I seemed to be fully charged. I am an absolute believer in freedom. In my opinion, entering the marriage component family is nothing more than a person's free choice. And if this choice makes people fall into the quagmire or even give up the higher yearning and pursuit of a free soul, it can only prove that this choice is wrong. Being unruly and unjudged, this is the happiest life I can think of. I can't imagine that one day I will no longer yearn for freedom, then that day is the end of the world for me, I don't know how I can survive in that world. I know, I know, someone will start laughing at my young innocence again, yes, I'm still young, I'm still very idealistic. But just like I can’t even count on when I will completely fall in love with a person, I may change my current thinking in the future, but it will only be more distant in the foreseeable future. Count on.

Having said so much, it can be boiled down to one point, how difficult and great it is to be a mother. But in the final analysis, it was just such a fluttering compliment. Everything is said to others, and only oneself is the one who has to bear the countless hardships and pains behind it. I am a very selfish person. I am grateful to my mother for giving me life, but I do not intend to use this hard-won life to make myself miserable. By nature, as long as you are still alive, you will worry about your child. This is not a simple one-time event, it is a dilemma that lasts a lifetime.

I am really terrified. I am not saying that I am determined not to have children. I never say such absolute things. Everything changes. But I sincerely hope that I can always keep this fear in my heart, and even in the future, I will not succumb to the impulse under the action of hormones and push myself into a dilemma that has no way out.

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Extended Reading
  • Meaghan 2021-12-29 08:01:48

    I always feel that the most fascinating point of this story has not been photographed

  • Korey 2022-03-27 09:01:13

    A good sketch, with a very delicate script. The criticism of men is a little deliberate, but it is also true. Well, straight men all over the world are a virtue. Marlo's attitude towards Tully reminds me of how my relatives look at me. Charlize Theron is starting to transform again. (on half of the plane)

Tully quotes

  • Tully: I get that.

    Marlo: Of course you do.

  • Drew: Can we keep her?

    Marlo: She's not a dog.