Devlin Adams:
So, where's Danny?
Katherine:
[pause]
Devlin, Danny is at his wedding.
Devlin Adams:
Come again?
Katherine:
I was never married to him. All a big lie I made up.
Devlin Adams:
Why?
Katherine:
Because I couldn't stand the thought of you knowing the truth.
Devlin Adams:
Really?
Katherine:
So, yeah. I'm a single mother. I have two kids I love more than anything in the world. I drive a Honda, I still have dial-up internet. I got a 2.7 GPA in college, not a 3.4. And while I'm at it telling the truth, I name my kids' poop after you. And I work for Danny. I'm his assistant. That's it.
Devlin Adams:
Really? I would never have guessed this. I mean, you two had a real connection.
Katherine:
He's great, he's the greatest guy, and I might even be in love with him, but it really doesn't matter at this moment because he is getting married to another person, right now.
Devlin Adams:
[pause]
Ian and I are breaking up.
Katherine:
What? What happened?
Devlin Adams:
Well for starters, he's gay. I mean look at him
Ian Maxtone Jones:
[with a group of sailors]
That's a strong muscle, right there. I'm squeezin'.
Katherine:
Devlin, I gotta tell you, last night, with the ass grab of the coconut, little bit of a red flag.
Devlin Adams:
I've seen him do that with the soap.
Katherine:
Oh! What about the iPod?
Devlin Adams:
He didn't invent shit. He made his money suing the Dodgers after he got hit by a foul ball.
Katherine:
[laughs]
Oh God! So what?
Devlin Adams:
Well, this is different?
Katherine:
Yeah, I mean, why didn't we try this truth telling thing before?
Devlin Adams:
I don't know.
[They hug. Devlin sees Danny behind Katherine]
Danny:
Aww, that's nice. It's nice to tell the truth. The truth is fun, isn't it? Like were you telling the truth when you said you might be in love with me?
Devlin Adams:
I'm gonna leave you two. Gotta go get a divorce.