Michael Moore:
Hope for the best is what we do, right from the moment we're born. We've got the worst infant mortality rate in the western world. A baby in El Salvador has a better chance of surviving than a baby born in Detroit. But it gets better when we go to school.
Spokeperson:
Classrooms with 40 students. Schools with no science labs.
Michael Moore:
Ha, no wonder the majority of our young adults can't find Britain on the map. But that's okay. There's always college. And by the time we graduate, our ass is so in hock, we're deep in debt before we even have our first job.
college student in debt:
I'm at about - we'll say about 35,000 dollars in debt. That's for my third year of college.
Michael Moore:
That way, you'll be the kind of employee they're looking for - one who needs this job. But what employer wouldn't want to employ someone thousands of dollars in debt? Because they won't cause any trouble. In addition to having to pay off your college debt, you need a job with health insurance. It would be horrible to lose that kind of job. And if that one job doesn't pay all the bills, don't worry, you can get another one, and another one, and another one.
woman who works 3 jobs:
I work three jobs, and I feel like I contribute.
George W. Bush:
You work three jobs?
woman who works 3 jobs:
Three jobs, yes.
George W. Bush:
[to crowd]
Uniquely American, isn't it? I mean that is fantastic that you're doing that. Get any sleep?
Michael Moore:
And if you're not getting enough sleep, take pharmecuticals.
[a montage of several pharmaceutical commercials is shown, all saying the "Ask Your doctor" catchphrase]
Michael Moore:
Yes, ask your doctor, and ask him for more drugs. That should keep you pretty doped up until it's time to retire. D-did I say retire?
[Moore sarcastically laughs]
Michael Moore:
Well if you do make it to 80, I'm sure your pension will still be there. Unlike the new employees for these companies which will never see a pension.
[a quick slide show shows many companies, such as Coca-Cola, IBM, GM, Hershey's, Sprint and FedEx]
Michael Moore:
But don't worry, I'm sure our kids will take care of us. Considering the great life we've given them. Oh, and remember: Let's defeat the terrorists over there, so we don't have to fight them here.
