"Stranger Things" is here again. When we are immersed in the horror and feelings of the 1980s, have we ever thought about how to survive in a crisis-ridden American town?
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Stranger Things and a small-town American survival guide
If I were born in a small American town, I wouldn't want to live in an area named after a plant, like Springtree, Elm Street, or even Cabin 1427.
When I was a kid, I would be extra careful when I played. Toys would rather be washed down the drain by the rain than reach out to pick them up.
I will make warm-blooded friends, in case of emergency, I can explore together, but I will never offend the haunted house.
When I was in elementary school, I would pretend to be sick to avoid school summer camps, especially the place called Crystal Lake.
When I was young, I finally had the right to speak at home. I will inquire about the residents near my house, if they have any previous murders, or at least if they have any relatives who are mentally ill. If so, I will urge my parents to move out as soon as possible.
Scientists are by no means my good neighbors, let alone renting my basement. Who knows what they are doing in the dead of night.
When I finally reached adolescence, I would rather curb my hormonal agitation than go to a party in the suburbs, especially those huts in the woods that have been forgotten by some relatives who have been in disrepair for many years.
The goddess who has been in love for a long time, invite me to participate in the psychic game, I will - categorically refuse! I just want to be a quiet dick.
At the end of my college years, I wouldn't shy away from prom, but I made sure to stay at the safety exit so I could leave at any time.
As an adult, I became sane and at home. Harvest during the day, rest at night, never go to the cornfield at night, and don't disturb the lovely children's party.
I clean the barn regularly because I don't want weird creatures to thrive there.
For any reason, I don't go to pagan cemeteries, altars, and especially ancient ruins left by the Indians on the edge of town.
On Halloween night, I'll be extra careful and try to satisfy every kid who comes for candy. Of course, in addition to respect for children, there is also fear, who knows what is under their masks.
Even if I take all precautionary measures, on the day when people are not as good as the sky, the town is shrouded in thick fog, I will take my family and leave without stopping for a moment.
And if I'm not a young American in a small town, I'll eventually travel by car, and I'll avoid staying in unreliable bars on the Mexican border.
It will also selectively listen to the advice of the staff at the gas station, and pay attention that the back seat will not get into the strange person.
Of course, I wouldn't stay in an informal motel, especially one with a weird-looking owner.
Also, I try to be nice to people who look vicious because they may not be as scary as they seem.
Likewise, I wouldn't be unsuspecting of a superficial gentleman, because behind the suit - probably the darkest secret of the town.
If I did all this and had the luck to escape town, I wouldn't be in a rush to celebrate. I will confirm that all this is not a dream, not an illusion, because, maybe I can't leave at all...
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