Calvin Candie:
Hello. Stephen, my boy!
Stephen:
[black house servant exiting the Big House]
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hello, my ass. Who dis nigger up on dat nag?
Calvin Candie:
Aw, Stephen, you have nails for breakfast? What's the matter? Why you so ornery? You miss me? Huh?
Stephen:
Oh, yes, sir. I miss you like a hawg miss slop. Like a baby miss mammy titty! I miss you like I misses a rock in my shoe! Now, I aks you, who dis nigger on dat nag?
Django:
Hey, Snowball. You wanna know my name or the name of my horse, you ask me.
Stephen:
Just who the hell you callin' 'Snowball,' hoss boy? I'll snatch yo black ass off dat nag down here in the mud so fast make yo head spin!
Calvin Candie:
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Stephen! Stephen! Let's keep it funny. Django here's a freeman.
Stephen:
Dis nigger here?
Calvin Candie:
That nigger there. Let me at least introduce the two of you. Django, this is a another cheeky black bugger like yourself, Stephen. Stephen, this here is Django. You two oughta hate each other.
Stephen:
Calvin, just who the hell is dis nigger you feel's the need to entertain?
Calvin Candie:
Django, and his friend in gray here, Dr. Schultz, are customers. And they are our guests, Stephen. And you, you old, decrepit bastard, you are to show them every hospitality. You understand that?
Stephen:
Yes, sir. Him I understands, but I don't know why I got to take lip off dis nigger.
Calvin Candie:
You don't have to know why. Do you understand?
Stephen:
Yes, sir. I understand.
Calvin Candie:
Well, good. They're spending the night. Go open the guest bedrooms and get two ready.
Stephen:
[mortified]
He gawn stay in the Big House?
Calvin Candie:
Stephen. He's a slaver. It's different.
Stephen:
In the Big House?
Calvin Candie:
Well, you got a problem with that?
Stephen:
Aw, naw, naw. I ain't got no problem with it. If you ain't got no problem with burnin' the bed, the sheets, the pillowcase, and everything else when this black-ass motherfucker's gone!
Calvin Candie:
That is my problem! They are mine to burn! Now your problem right now is making a good impression! And I want you to start solving that problem right now and get them goddamn rooms ready!
Stephen:
Yes, sir, Monsieur Candie.
Calvin Candie:
Go on, now.
Stephen:
Cain't believe you brought a nigger to stay in the Big House. Yo daddy's rollin' over in his goddamn grave, right now. Brought a nigger to stay with us. What kinda shit is that?
Calvin Candie:
Man, the lip on him! Whoo! He's getting worse and worse. Now, WHERE IS MY BEAUTIFUL SISTER?
