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Diane Farrow: There was this experiment where an electrode was planted in the pleasure center of a monkey's brain. When the monkey hit a button, it sent a signal to the electrode, in effect, exciting the monkey sexually.
Woman at luncheon: You're kidding.
Diane Farrow: No. Can you guess what happened?
Woman at luncheon: Was it a male monkey?
Diane Farrow: Yes.
Woman at luncheon: He slammed the button till he died.
Diane Farrow: Oh, so you know this experiment?
Woman at luncheon: I know men, honey.
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[first lines]
Paul Matthews: [voice-over] About once a month my friends and I get together and do something different for fun. Sometimes we go bowling or miniature golf or a movie or something. One night we went down to a gypsy palm reader at 34th and Vine.
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Paul Matthews: You look familiar.
Prince Geoffrey: Yeah, I'm the Prince of England.
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Diane Farrow: Was there a second date that I'm not aware of?
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Diane Farrow: You know, all my life, I've felt ugly, and now I have the worlds most desireable man telling me that I am beautiful. I have the Prince of England at home pining for me. I mean, Paul, this is like a dream come true. i could be a princess.
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Enrico Pazzoli: Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are?
Diane Farrow: No. No one in their right mind.
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Prince Geoffrey: You're not speaking. You notice Diane isn't speaking?
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[last lines]
Madame Ruth: Ahh, that's nice.
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Paul Matthews: Except for the fact she had kind of a boyfriend, Diane was exactly my type.
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Paul Matthews: Well, I'd like to tell you that 5 minutes after I kissed Diane she came running out into my arms and that we fell in love forever, but that's not what happened.
Paul Matthews: It took six minutes.
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Paul Matthews: How do you synthesize a methylated alkaloid?
Cheryl: [short pause] I don't know.
Paul Matthews: Too bad.
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Paul Matthews: Hey, what do you think of those pretzels?
Love Potion No. 9 Quotes
Extended Reading
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