Man Seeking Woman Quotes

Liz: Joshua, want to have a little "look at yourself" moment?

Josh Greenberg: No. No.

Liz: Do you go to the gym?

Josh Greenberg: No.

Liz: Do you have a job?

Josh Greenberg: I-I-I... I'm a temp.

Liz: Okay. Well, how does that sound to a lady?

Josh Greenberg: If she's a temp, she'll like it.

Josh Greenberg: What happened?

Bartender: I slipped on your dick, then it flew in the air and I landed on my back and I guess my mouth was open because it fell right in my mouth! And then I spat it out and well, long story short... it's in the toilet.

Josh Greenberg: It's in the toilet...? Oh man, can you please fish it out for me?