I want to live like Tsubaki Juro, okay?
Do whatever you want, travel the world alone, sleep when you are sleepy, and move forward when you wake up.
Can one really get rid of everything?
Even if I put aside all my thoughts and understand all the philosophical truths, in practice, it is like rebelling against all my existence.
I graduated and started to enter the track of work. My job is not what I like, but I can only do it. I can't give up my position in the social judgment system. But I want to let it go, because death is right in front of everyone, and death forces people to think about it on everyone's head. Don't give up? To face death like this? Will you regret it?
To give up? But this separation seems to be rebelling against all my existence. What about life? What about the future? What about my presence?
Not giving up will rebel against my consciousness, and giving up will rebel against my existence, my humanity.
Is it really possible to live without contradictions like Tsubaki Juro?
Is there really no contradiction between Tsubaki Juro? How would he feel in the face of death?
I think, I can never be Tsubaki Juro, but I will always be Tsubaki thirty, contradicting, contradicting, when I reach a certain situation, I may really become Tsubaki.
Pain.
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