I finally finished watching the movie version of "Marriage Life" after watching the 2021 drama version of "Marriage Life". The three-hour-long movie is almost exclusively John and Marianne dialogue, like the real situation in a marriage, you are facing only one person to share your life with. Marriage is indispensable to the stability of society and the reproduction of human beings. In the whole process of human development, people who do not get married are often ridiculed, as if marriage is the truth and the only way to achieve a fulfilling life. But how many marriages are happy? When I was a child, I would think that the bride with a headband wedding dress and a white dress holding flowers smiled brightly, and it was the most beautiful on the wedding day. But what I saw when I was a child was all the positive side of the world, and what I saw was all happiness and happiness. Because of the limited experience and experience, and the beautification of memory, I thought that marriage would be as beautiful as the one in the TV series. Later, because he was no longer under the care of his grandparents, he returned to his nuclear family and felt how dire the marriage of his parents was, full of anger and violence. But at that time, due to the limited ability and knowledge, and the lack of awakening of female consciousness, although I felt that this relationship was unhealthy, it was unable to resist the violence of my father. When I grew up and experienced some intimate relationships, I felt more and more reluctance to maintain this relationship, as if I was playing a role, similar to the role that a wife should play in a patriarchal society. Sometimes I clearly feel that this relationship has already subsided and cooled down, but since I haven't officially said goodbye, I still take the initiative to share it with the other party, although I don't want to tell the other party about my inner turmoil. Is this pandering because of some moral restraint? But after I decided to leave, I could not say a word at all and concentrate on exploring the meaning of my life.
How many people build an intimate relationship and run a marriage because they see the uniqueness of each other and understand each other's soul. In my case, I didn't seem to like each other because I saw them at first, I was very cunning. At first, I will be attracted by the beautiful feathers of the other party, but everyone will like the beautiful feathers. Later, when I find out that there is something unacceptable in the other party, I will choose to leave the other party. Such as misogyny, extreme, cowardly, irresponsible, swearing and other qualities. In the divorce case of an elderly couple handled by Marianne, the grandmother did not feel love in this marriage and wanted to divorce. After the husband delayed for 15 years and the children grew up, the grandmother continued to divorce. Love is something that is difficult to describe with words, but can be felt with the heart. More and more it has become an indispensable condition for the current marriage. Marianne and John became a couple. Marianne has always been childish, refused to grow up, always catered to others and tolerated others, and arranged her life well for John. There was no volcanic eruption, and John was tired of her, and she didn't even notice that she had cheated. Before John told her he had fallen in love with Paula, she waited for him to come home and prepare meals for him. I have always wronged myself to satisfy the other party, but what I get is the betrayal of the other party. Yes, if a person doesn't even care about his own emotions, how can he pay attention to the emotions of others? And I have always played a role similar to Marianne in my relationship. If it sounds good, it is called paying for the other party without reservation. Although the value of the heart cannot be measured by its worth, but every time it hurts and hurts, I feel that I am very good to the other party, and I waste a lot of time that should be used to improve myself, but I get bored and alienated from the other party. or escape.
After the separation, Marianne was no longer confined to her wife's identity, and began to be herself boldly, to please her body, to grow up, and to explore herself more deeply. But when she read to John what she had written, John fell asleep. John is a psychiatry lecturer who can write poetry and publish books. It is reasonable to say that he is a person who can cherish words, but his thoughts drifted to the sky when he listened to his wife's thoughts on life and self. John hasn't seen Marianne in this relationship, and after Marianne has stepped forward, he's still slacking off, trying to get back into his comfort zone, back into his wife's arms. After Marianne has a new intimacy, she uses the patriarchal stigma of free women to satirize Marianne as a slutty woman. Some people say that a city changes faster than people's hearts. But I don't think that people's heart is the biggest variable. Sometimes in intimate relationships, I also ask, do I really know the person in front of me? John left resolutely at first, and later lived unsatisfactorily with a third party, and wanted to return to Marian's arms, but Marian chose to divorce, and he began to sneer and abuse, and the vested interests were so ugly. After the divorce, they met again, and the two had a close relationship, but they cheated together again. Is it out of habit? But in doing so they hurt each other's partners.
The movie doesn't make me terrified of marriage, because I believe that marriage as a relationship must have a dark side. Marriage, intimacy, and even everything you experience in life is for the purpose of understanding yourself better and seeking self-development and exploration, which is by no means meaningless. Even some failures have given me a deeper understanding of my own gender awareness. who I am? Where am I going? These questions may take a lifetime to answer. Perhaps the experience of exploring the answers to these questions itself gives us meaning.
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