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Nancy: [about Oliver] I thieved for you when I was a child not half his age, and I've thieved for you ever since, don't you know it!
Fagin: And if you have, it is your living!
Nancy: Aye, it is. It is my living. And you're the wretch that drove me to them long ago, and that'll keep me there, day and night, day and night, DAY AND NIGHT!
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Mr. Brownlow: The law assumes that your wife acts under your direction.
Mr. Bumble: If the law supposes that, then the law is a ass, a idiot! If that's the eye of the law, then the law is a bachelor. And the worst I wish the law is that his eye may be opened by experience.
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Fagin: What's become of the boy? Speak or I'll throttle you!
Dodger: The traps have got him, and that's all about it!
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Nancy: I will not turn on the others because, bad as they are, they never turned on me.
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Fagin: Strike them all dead! What right have you to butcher me?
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Oliver Twist: Please, sir, I want some more.
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Mr. Bumble: You'll make your fortune, Mr Sowerberry.
Mr. Sowerberry: The prices allowed by the board are very small.
Mr. Bumble: So are the coffins.
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Noah Claypole: Do you know who I am?
Oliver Twist: No, sir.
Noah Claypole: I'm Mr Noah Claypole and you're under me so don't you forget it!
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Mr. Sowerberry: There's an expression of melancholy in his face, my dear, which is *very* interesting.
Oliver's Mother: Well?
Mr. Sowerberry: He'd make a delightful mute, my love.
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Mr. Bumble: Where is this audacious young savage?
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Noah Claypole: Workhouse, what's your mother?
Oliver Twist: She's dead.
Noah Claypole: What - she die of workhouse?
Oliver Twist: They said she died of a broken heart.
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Fagin: Clever dogs, clever dogs. Never blowed on old Fagin.
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Fagin: You'd like to make pocket handkerchiefs as easily as the Artful Dodger, wouldn't you my dear?
Oliver Twist: Yes, if you teach me sir.
Fagin: We will, my dear, we will.
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Nancy: He'll blow on us Fagin, for certain.
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Mr. Bumble: Cry your hardest now, it opens the lungs, washes the countenance, exercises the eyes and softens down the temper. So cry away.
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Mr. Brownlow: Somehow I feel you and I are going to be good friends.
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Mr. Brownlow: How would you like to grow up a clever man and write books?
Oliver Twist: I think I'd rather read them sir.
Mr. Brownlow: What, don't you want to be a book writer?
Oliver Twist: I think I'd rather be a bookseller sir.
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Oliver Twist: I don't know them, I don't belong with them.
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Bill Sikes: There's light enough for what I've got to do.
Nancy: Why are you looking at me like that? Oh, no! No! No! Bill! Bill! Bill!
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Mr. Brownlow: It only remains for me to tell you that neither of you will ever be employed in a position of trust again.
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Town Crier: [SPOILER] Murder! Brutal Murder!
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Nancy: Let him be or I'll put that mark on you that'll send me to the gallows before me time.
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Bill Sikes: Fair or not fair, give it 'ere you avaricious old skeleton.
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Fagin: That's the worst of having to deal with women, my dears. But they're clever and we can't get on without them.
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Oliver Twist: Please, sir. I want some more.
Workhouse Master: What?
Mrs. Corney: What?
Mr. Bumble: What?
Chairman of the Board: Ask for more?
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[first lines]
Doctor Who Delivers Oliver: It's all over, Mrs. Thingummy.
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Chairman of the Board: Gentlemen, it is my considered opinion that our charity is being presumed upon.
Workhouse Board Member: Here, here...
Chairman of the Board: This Workhouse has become a regular place of *entertainment* for the poorer classes.
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Mr. Sowerberry: I've just taken the measure of the two women that died last night.
Mr. Bumble: Coffins are looking up, Mr. Sowerberry.
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Mr. Bumble: You'll make your fortune, Mr. Sowerberry.
Mr. Sowerberry: The prices allowed by the Board are very small, Mr. Bumble.
Mr. Bumble: So are the coffins.
Mr. Sowerberry: Well, well, Mr. Bumble, there's no denying that. But we must have some profit, Mr. Bumble.
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Mr. Bumble: Be good enough to tell Mr. Sowerberry that the beadle is here.
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Mrs Sowerberry: Your bed's under the counter. You don't mind, I suppose?
Oliver Twist: No, ma'am.
Mrs Sowerberry: Doesn't much matter whether you do or you don't, for you can't sleep anywhere else.
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Mr. Sowerberry: A very good looking boy, that, my dear.
Mrs Sowerberry: He need be. He eats enough.
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Noah Claypole: You know, Workhouse, your mother must have been a regular, right-down bad 'un.
Oliver Twist: What did you say?
Noah Claypole: A regular, right-down bad 'un, Workhouse. And it's a great deal better, Workhouse, that she died when she did, or else she'd have been doing hard labor in Bridewell. Or transported or hung, which is more likely than either.
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Mrs Sowerberry: Fetch the beadle!
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Mr. Bumble: He comes from a bad family, sir. Excitable natures, Mrs. Sowerberry.
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Bill Sikes: What's it all about, Fagin?
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Bill Sikes: What's in the wind, Fagin?
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Oliver Twist: Twist. Oliver Twist.
Mr. Brownlow: Hmm, that's a queer name.
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Mrs. Corney: Are you gonna sit there snoring all day?
Mr. Bumble: I shall sit here as long as I think proper, ma'am. And though I was not snoring, I shall snore, gape, sneeze, laugh or cry as the humor strikes me.
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Mr. Bumble: The prerogative of a man is to command.
Mrs. Corney: And what's the prerogative of a woman, in the name of goodness?
Mr. Bumble: To obey, ma'am.
Mrs. Corney: Huh!
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Mrs. Bedwin: Mr. Brownlow wants to see you, and we must make you smart as sixpence.
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Mr. Grimwig: You old women never believe anything but quack doctors and lying story books.
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Mr. Grimwig: I'll take the liberty, if you'll allow me, of helping us both to a glass of sherry.
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Bill Sikes: You hold your tongue and keep your melting pot ready.
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Landlord Of 'Three Cripples': Now, ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce to you, a charming young singer who has never appeared in public before. Miss Lucy Willow.
Singer At 'Three Cripples': [singing] This morning early, My malady was such, I in my tea took brandy, And I took a drop too much...
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Mr. Bumble: I have the dubious pleasure of naming these orphans. Alphabetically. The last one was Swallow, this one I've named Twist.
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Mr. Brownlow: He'll be back in 20 minutes.
Mr. Grimwig: Are you sure he will return ? That boy has a new set of clothes, a pack of valuable books, and a £5 note in his pocket. If he returns back to this house I will eat my hat.
Oliver Twist Quotes
Extended Reading
